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Bun out of the oven!
26th-Aug-2011 09:51 am
Niv "Who me?"
Hi everyone! Hope your October not-so-babies are doing well. Mine started public kindergarten yesterday and it went really well. He came home happy, says he made friends, and his teacher seems very sweet. I guess I'm lucky that California's cut-off date is still December 1.

I have a question about the almost-five-year-olds. Niv cries about EVERYTHING these days. He asks a question. I'm not exactly clear on what he's asking, so I give him the best answer I can. It's not quite what he was after. He starts crying instead of asking a follow-up question. (I've tried to tell him that if I don't quite understand what he's asking, he should try asking in a different way. This also makes him cry. Sigh.)

I tell him he needs to play with some toys, that it's not time to watch TV. TANTRUM. Oh my G-D! How can Mommy make me PLAY?!

The other day, I had to FORCE him to go outside and play for half an hour. He started bargaining, saying he'd only play for 20 minutes. He spent 45 minutes crying about how he didn't want to go outside and play before he actually went out, and then he spent another 10 minutes crying before he and his brother actually found out that, shockingly, playing is FUN.

It's just been really frustrating with him lately. He wanted to do a (48-piece) puzzle this morning (great!). He insisted that he "can't" do it, even though his 2.5-year-old brother is perfectly happy to sit down with a puzzle and at least give it a try (and usually eventually succeeds). I gave him some tips to get started (we've done plenty of puzzles together. He's no newbie). He sat there with a pile of puzzle pieces in front of him, whimpering and crying. I don't get it.

I've read that this is fairly normal in the months leading up to turning 5, but I'm going a little batty. I'm due any day now with our third, and I don't have the patience for all the whimpering, whining, and crying. (Whining, I kind of take for granted, with an almost-5-year-old and a 2.5-year-old, but the whimpering and outright screaming tantrums kind of get to me.) Plus, I can't man-handle him (he's 56 pounds) the way I would have if he needs to be in timeout or whatever, so I feel like I spend a lot of time yelling or lecturing myself hoarse, only to have the same conversations day after day.

Maybe I just needed to vent. Haha. Okay, everybody vent about your almost-5-year-olds! :)
26th-Aug-2011 05:33 pm (UTC)
Um, you have just described Annika's behaviour! The other morning, after she asked for a muffin in a blue muffin cup, which I gave her only to have her cry for a pink one, and then cut up in response to her request, which was met with sobbing because she wanted it whole, my husband turned to me and said, "What is this? Did we do something wrong? Are we bad parents?" He was only half joking. I'm finding this phase, which seems to have started about a month ago, VERY trying.
26th-Aug-2011 07:26 pm (UTC)
we've been having a lot of the same issues - when ellie gets whiny and cannot articulate what she wants, we send her to her room - it's not really a punishment (she's got tons of books and toys and snuggly stuff in her room) but she realizes that the whining is not something enjoyable for the rest of the family to listen to. usually after a few minutes she'll call to us and ask to rejoin us if she talks to us in a normal tone.

we also do a lot of the "you get what you get so don't get upset" when it comes to dishes, cups, stuff like that.
26th-Aug-2011 08:22 pm (UTC)
Hm, yes, this sounds sort of familiar. I am pretty sure it's growth spurt related for Sam because he's also suddenly very accident-prone. About a year and a half ago, he had several little injuries within the space of 2 weeks that also coincided with being exhausted, acting hyper, meltdowns, and growing a lot. Recognizing a pattern makes it slightly easier to put it into perspective and keep my patience this time around.
26th-Aug-2011 10:21 pm (UTC)
Jenna is acting very similar as well. Bursts out in tears for pretty much no reason...fun times. It's good to hear we're not the only ones going through this.

We're currently having a bitch of a time finding a pre-school for Jenna. She's definitely not ready for regular K, but all the pre-school are way too expensive or only 5 days a week (we're looking for a 3 day). I don't think PRE-school should be this stressful & complicated. :/
29th-Aug-2011 07:28 pm (UTC)
I don't remember writing this? Really though, Niv is North, North is Niv. North whines about every.single.thing. including playing outside. I also have a two year old(and a 9 week old!) who very often seems like the older brother since he's not constantly crumbling into a puddle on the floor! I've kind of just assumed North was very sensitive, so I'm happy to hear it might just be a phase!

Our cut-off date in Michigan is also December 1st, but we chose to start North in a developmental kindergarten this year. It's only open to kids born between August 1st-December 1st, so they're all "young fives" and it's a smaller class size. He doesn't start until after Labor Day, but I'm hoping he has fun.

Good luck with your upcoming birth! Do you know what your having? If I remember correctly, you have two boys, right? I am now the mom of three boys and just starting to get the hang of it....9 weeks later!
29th-Aug-2011 07:34 pm (UTC)
It's so reassuring to hear about everyone with similarly melting four-year-olds. Heh. Makes me less worried that I've done something wrong!

California also starting offering what they call a "transitional kindergarten," which is a two-year kindergarten program. Sounds similar to what you're doing. Niv is academically so advanced (after two years in Montessori) that we didn't think he'd need it. I was worried about his social development, but I watched him carefully with other kids through the spring and summer, and he does fine. I think he'll be happy. He said there are some other almost-5s in his class, too, so I think we made the right decision.

I have two boys. Shai is 2 years and 8 months. I'm having another boy, too. Three boys should be interesting! And, hey, nine weeks isn't bad for getting the hang of three boys. I only hope I do as well! :)
1st-Sep-2011 04:21 am (UTC)
I just got divorced and all 3 kids live with their dad so I don't know if Maeve has the crying issue. She just started pre-K and as far as I know is loving it. Her dad was told she was really at the level of a first grader so I hope she doesn't get bored. I'm sure her teacher is having fun with her! I think it was one of the first days that Maeve decided to hide and then have her teacher (an older lady) chase her because she didn't want to come in after recess.

She can be a lot of fun to talk to! Recently some family I hadn't seen in almost 30 years came to visit, my cousin was talking to Maeve about something, and I guess she asked the same question again because Maeve looked at her and something like "you need to pay attention to what I tell you!"
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